Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Sonic Movie: Still Bad News

The Sonic Movie still needs to.......


"What? GET RID of Something Sonic?" Said at SonicGear?

Because it's yet another franchise that won't see 'justice' if it gets a live action movie. Every single fan of a video game character knows that games generally don't mix with live action. Especially things where the main character or focus is on stuff that just doesn't work IRL, like Ratchet & Klank or even something like Mario. There's a reason these game movies keep failing and it's because the stuff doesn't belong IRL, even Mortal Kombat didn't do so hot because all the killer magic whatever they do is totally impossible and looks stupid on the big screen.

So why have this chat again?
Because it's changed hands again. Everyone thought we were safe from the horror that the movie will be once Sony or whoever had it said it stunk and quit off it. But now that Fast & Furious director guy got it and still wants it to be live action. You'd think he'd be smart, or at least rich enough to hire somebody smart after making all those car movies, wouldn't you?

Guess not.

There's only one way to do a Sonic movie right, and that's either all animation like the Pony FIM movie or all CG like the Ratchet Klank movie. THATS IT. Sonic is so abstract that having him interacting in the non-cg will just break everything into stupidville forever.Sonic is only now getting 'back on his feet' with Mania's release doing well and not being panned by everybody ever. (Insert 'sonic cycle' here)  He doesn't need his name going through the mud for some stupid Hollywood cash in attempt that will put the studio in the hole for money after it brutally fails.

Nobody is listening:
The fans have hated the idea since day 1 and complained constantly.
Who do they think is going to see the movie if not the fans?
IRL Video game movies don't tend to work
Can't they look at the huge field of flops?
CG or animated movies from animated properties do better
Can't they look at the improved track record?

As a director/content maker you can't say "Well, the fans of this franchise are stupid. I'm going to do my own thing with this franchise, that I'm not even a fan of, and they will love it, because I know this franchise better than they do, even though I just bought in last month".
But that's sure what they seem to do!

Any time it's Sonic+humans it doesn't work so well. Having Elise from Sonic 360 to kiss Sonic was super gross and cringey. Having him carry her looked just bonkers because he's a conglomeration of stick-limbs with a gigantic mono-eye-ball that has moving color chips sliding across its glassy surface. It's fine in context but..........not next to a realistic human. And he's not the only character either, you've got literally everybody else in the cast.

Do movie-makers do research before they start?
It seems like the answer is no. There's a REASON you do CG Advent Children: nobody looks as good* as Sephiroth IRL, nor Cloud's hair. These preposterous people like Lara Croft & the Hulk and Piccolo & Goku are cool to look at because they CANT exist here. Putting a bunch of makeup on some actress is never going to work. "Changing it to be more realistic" and you get that rubbish DBZ movie that was so bad we never speak of it.

Who got justice?
The Smurfs. Remember the first smurf movies where they were CG with live action? Smurf fans didn't really dig these. But the all-cg all-smurf movie? Good stuff, according to smurf fans.

Ratchet & Klank.
I am not a fan of these guys because I never even tried one game. But the movie made SENSE in that universe, everybody looked right & like the games and it didn't slander/sully/ruin/degrade any character. (According to people who know the characters)

The My Little Ponies
Yeah they were animated to begin with, but their movie kept them where they belong: animated. You could have thrown in some "magical IRL girl who gets to Mary Sue her way into pony-land after Pinkie Pie is in New York CITTYYYYY because magic. So the Ponies all come to Earth and Mary Sue has to save them". You absolutely can feel that being on the plate at some point. "Big screen = real humans!" But they resisted the urge and the fans of the show seem to think the movie is good.

I have no idea about this much beyond simple lore but the whole thing was CG so it worked. No one would believe those giant orc guys or whatever otherwise.

Pokemon: Always animated. As it should be. Too many of them are too absurd (abstract floating stuff) or loses every fiber of cuteness when "Rendered as real"

It's possible for franchisees to get justice from a movie. The only one really screwing it up so far is the Bayformers because somehow people keep going to see those despite them hardly having anything to do with the actual........you know......transforming robots. And also sullying characters from the show/comic/whatever & dragging them through the mud of acting 'ooc' and more.

*It doesn't matter if YOU are not a fan and don't like the franchise or think the character is ugly. As long as it looks like how the book/comic/game/show had it, it's fine. If you don't like the franchise or hate ponies or something, but the fans loved it that's fine. It's FOR the fans. If it brings in more fans? Fine. If not...oh well. (Example: FIM fandom was bigger in previous years while the fad was hotter than it was now. The movie would have done better when the fad was hotter--but movies take a long time to make.)

Closing statement: CG SONIC MOVIE ONLY